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Attitude of Gratitude—Become Happier & Healthier!

by Gina Woods

Do your children commonly say things like: "I never get to do anything fun" or "Why don't we get to go on vacation all the time like the Jones family?" or even worse, "I hate my life!"

Now, don't panic! I'm not saying that there is something terribly wrong in your home if they do. Most parents have probably heard similar statements spawn out of their little darlings. In fact, these may be statements that you yourself have even mumbled (or yelled) on occasion! Am I right?

So what's my point, you ask?

You've most likely heard the old saying encouraging you to "count your blessings." Well, recent scientific studies now show that counting your blessings is very beneficial to your health! New research conducted by Robert A. Emmons at the University of California at Davis and Michael E. McCullough of the University of Miami, shows that people who consciously remind themselves (everyday) of the things they are grateful for show marked improvements in mental health and some aspects of physical health.

Religions and philosophies have long embraced gratitude as an indispensable manifestation of virtue, and an integral component of health, wholeness, and well being. Scientists are latecomers to the concept of gratitude as a "forgotten factor" in happiness research.

One gratitude study asked participants to keep a gratitude journal and record four or five things for which they were thankful each day—even if it was just a sunny day. "In just two to three weeks," McCullough said, "they reported being happier." And, "People close to them could see the difference too."

"With gratitude, there is virtually no down side," said McCullough. And there's a major upside: "Most grateful people have low rates of depression and negative moods—but high self-esteem." There was evidence that gratitude is related to reduced risk of major depression, generalized anxiety disorder, phobia, bulimia nervosa, nicotine dependence, alcohol dependence, and drug use/dependence.

A daily gratitude intervention (self-guided exercises) with young adults resulted in higher levels of alertness, enthusiasm, determination, attentiveness and energy compared to a focus on hassles or a downward social comparison.

Initial studies were inspired by the recognition that gratitude is one of the emotions that responds to activity in the moral domain. We feel anger when others harm us, guilt or shame when we harm others, and grateful when others treat us in a particularly pro-social way. Participants in the studies were more likely to report having helped someone with a personal problem or having offered emotional support to another.

Additionally, grateful individuals place less importance on material goods; they are less likely to judge their own and others success in terms of possessions accumulated; they are less envious of others; and are more likely to share their possessions with others relative to less grateful persons.

So what does all this mean for you and your family? Count your blessings. Count them one by one—no matter how great or small—count them all! You might just find yourself sleeping better, exercising more and caring more about other people. And you might have more positive energy to direct toward your children. Encourage an attitude of gratitude to your children and they'll grow up to be happier and healthier adults.

Life isn't always a bowl of cherries. Sometimes it may be difficult to overlook the problems and find the little treasures that are there. Take some advice from a third-grade teacher in Miami who reported in the Miami Herald that she always says a prayer of gratitude for her family and friends. "You don't wallow into negative thinking—you appreciate what you have." She said that she has even begun feeling grateful for her problems—just because of how good she feels once she conquers them! "If you're grateful you'll always be blessed with abundance."


Simple ways to Foster an Attitude of Gratitude:

1. Set aside a special time each day to reflect on the positive things that have happened throughout the day, or the previous day. These can be as simple as someone smiling at you or good weather. The important thing is to form a habit of being grateful on a regular basis.

2. Start keeping a "gratitude journal." Writing down the things that you are grateful for will create a wonderful "story" that you can re-read on days that aren't so good. Instead of dwelling on the negative things that may be happening, re-read your "stories" from days past when you had a more positive attitude. You'll soon begin to see things in a brighter light. You can purchase any journal or notebook for this purpose. There is a nice selection of writing journals available at www.spiritwithindesigns.com or you could create your own.

3. Begin to encourage an attitude of gratitude in your children too! By starting young, they'll grow up to be happier, healthier, and more grateful adults. They will learn by example, as they see you writing in your journal. Make a habit of discussing with your children some of the things that you are most grateful for each day and ask them to share a few things as well. There are some gratitude journals designed especially for children and teens also available at www.spiritwithindesigns.com/gratitude.html.

4. Avoid people and situations that tend to evoke negative feelings. Attitudes really do have a way of "rubbing off" on other people. Do what you can to help others think more positively, but don't be dragged down in the process.

5. Create a positive atmosphere in your home and at work. Keep plenty of photos, cards, mementos, etc. in places you spend a lot of time or pass through often to remind you of those things for which you are most grateful.

6. Reward yourself, and your children, for your gratitude efforts. You may wish to treat yourselves to ice cream Sundays as a prize for filling a week's worth of journal pages. And then, you'll have something new to be grateful for too! Yummy!!


Often times we can recall plenty of negative things but the positive ones are a little harder. Here are a few "good" things that can be found even in "bad" situations. They may help to get you thinking in a more positive direction!

1. It's raining, AGAIN. But, you remembered your umbrella!
2. Your son or daughter is sick. But, you got to "play hooky" from work and play monopoly with him/her all day!
3. Your car broke down. But, that tow truck driver was REALLY cute!
4. You were stuck in traffic for an hour. But, you avoided being in a terrible accident that happened just as you would have "normally" been passing through that stretch of road.
5. You had a fight with your spouse. But, now you'll get to "make up!"
6. Your electricity went out and STAYED out all night. But, you had a perfect excuse to order dinner delivery, eat by candlelight, and go to bed early!

Are you starting to get the picture?


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