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Whether we want to admit it or not, we, as mothers, play a large part in setting the tone of our home. Are we short tempered, cranky, and critical? Or do we display love, patience, and kindness?
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We have all heard the saying, "If Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!". The first time I saw that, it was imprinted on one of my fourth grade student's tee shirts. I read it and laughed. But later on, I realized how true that statement was. Whether we want to admit it or not, we, as mothers, play a large part in setting the tone of our home. Are we short tempered, cranky, and critical? Or do we display love, patience, and kindness? If we are honest, most of us exhibit all of those attributes at different times. What are some steps we can take to ensure that our home is as peaceful as possible? Here are a few suggestions that may help.
Watch Your Words
Did you ever stop and think how powerful words are? The Bible has quite a bit to say about the tongue. Proverbs 21:23 says that "whoever guards his mouth and tongue keeps his soul from troubles". Words can encourage, heal, build up, and bring life. Or they can tear down and destroy. It is so easy, in the heat of the moment, to say cutting, unkind, hurtful things to our children or husbands. This brings dissension and fighting to our home, and leaves everyone angry and upset. Careless, angry comments can leave their sting for a long time. Our children and teens can be corrected without degrading words. We can disagree with our husband without getting into a nasty word battle. Stop and think before you launch an attack with your tongue. Gentle, kind words diffuse anger and promote family harmony.
Regular Routines
As a teacher, this works in my classroom, and it also works in the home. All of us, children and adults alike, benefit from regular routines. When our meals, bedtimes, chores, and our children's homework time are on a fairly predictable schedule, it gives us a sense of structure, self-discipline, and resulting peace of mind. This contributes to a more tranquil homelife.
Think of how you feel yourself when your normal routine is thrown off schedule for some reason. You may feel cranky and unsettled. Your kids might also react negatively to an unstructured, confusing household.
Establish Rules and Consequences
Establish rules and consequences for your children's behavior. Be clear about what you expect and consistently follow through with the correction if they test the rules. Children and teens are more insecure if they are not sure what's expected, or if they feel that their parents don't have the backbone to be firm. I may have gotten angry when my parents would not let me do something as a child or teen. I probably accused them of being over-protective or assured them that ALL the other kids were allowed to do it! But deep down in, there was stability in knowing that they were in charge, not me.
The Family That Prays Together Stays Together
The cement that holds everything else together is our relationship with God. Daily prayer and Bible reading with and for your family can transform them in ways you never believed possible. Commit yourself to praying about every detail of their lives, and standing in the gap for them with your prayers. Pray with them over all of their daily concerns. Read the Bible with them, or Bible stories to them if they are young. Discuss how it relates to their lives. Let them witness you relying on God for all of your needs.
These four suggestions may seem simple and obvious, but they can go a long way in promoting peace, harmony, and mutual respect in our homes. We as mothers and wives have tremendous influence over our families. None of us are perfect in these areas, and we are human. But by positive words, structured routines, and established rules, we can have a more peaceful and happy home. Above all, putting God in control will give you the strength and foundation you need to accomplish this high calling.
About the Author
Inez Haythorn is a Christian wife, mother, elementary school teacher, pianist, and freelance writer. Her main writing interests are Christian writing, and writing about lifestyles and memoirs of the past. She is the publisher of Christian Family Treasures, Heirloom Memories, and Cherished Collections. Her goal is to glorify and honor God, and bless and help others. Copyright 2003. All rights reserved. http://www.christianfamilytreasures.com http://www.heirloom-memories.com http://www.cherishedcollections.com